News

MY MOTHER’S HEARTBREAKING STRUGGLES WITH DEMENTIA DISEASE

My eyes were soaked in tears that Christmas, when I traveled home to see my mum.

With a child’s feeling of a son who had missed his mum, I hurriedly alighted from my car upon arrival at my family home to embrace my heroine.

“Good afternoon Mama”, I heartily greeted her before a shocker followed.

My mum looked me in the face and said “welcome my inlaw”. What? In-wetin?

I knew that she was getting old but not too old not to recognize her beloved son, me Kanayochukwu!

“Ọ bụ m, Anayo nwa gị nwoke” meaning “it is me your son, Anayo”, I said to my mum who insisted that I was her inlaw. Unbelievable!

I hated that day, the day a highly priced mum would deny her son and call him someone else.

Not my mum, nne m ọma! Never!

Was it not the woman that lived for me, who would give me the last food available and would go to bed hungry; a woman I swore to work so hard to take care of till she dies? Devil is a liar!

My wife had made my life so beautiful and my dream of taking care of my mum come true.

Two years into our marriage, she suggested that my 72 years old mum come live with us in the city.

She wanted to let my mother have the best of what we could offer.

I never stopped telling her all that my mum did for me and how I would rather die than to live in comfort and she in need.

Who says that the two hearts of a loving couple don’t beat in concert?

My mum, though reluctantly, came to live with us and was “detained” for 12 years. It is usually a Herculean task to “uproot” an old Igbo woman from the village to come live in the city.

She nursed all our kids and formed a formidable team with my wife to keep me well behaved. Every judgement was in my wife’s favour.

All changed one day, 12 years after, when my mother called me into her room to complain that my wife had stolen £10 my friend from U.K. gifted her.

“That was a laughable accusation” I told her and she started crying.

I wasn’t swayed. It didn’t just add up.

She was my mom and I knew where and how she hid her money when I was growing up. I was sure she misplaced the money.

My junior brother and I would compete on who would be the first to “tap” 5 kobo from her bag which we used to buy akara and bread during recess periods in school.

I took her bag, her bank, and instinctively went for the zipped compartment by the inner corner and found the money and handed same over to her. She murmured that my wife must have surreptitiously returned the money.

How? When? I was confused.

Even though I had never doubted my mum or deemed her a liar before now, I was convinced that the devil was using someone who was using mum to destroy my marriage. My mum was too holy a vessel to be inhabited by devil.

Of all the amount of money in this world, how could my wife, a bank manager steal £10 from an old woman she provided for mostly from her own purse? Mbanụ!

But I never related this incident to my wife.

How would I?

That would have broken her heart and the damage would have been irreparable. Such tale could bring out the Jezebel in any daughter-in-law.

Then, another day came when my mum again accused my wife of stealing and seizing her bra.

My mum would not take it anymore.

She had determined to confront the accused but she waited for me to return from work before she tabled the issue.

This, like the other charge of stealing of £10, was also laughable.

What would my wife do with my mum’s bra?

Their upper hemispheres were just not comparable.

While my wife is like a modern day model both in shape and size, my mum was blessed with an envious pair of burst lines that would make boobsful Cossy Orjiakor look normal. Hers would made my father’s friends ask him “ị na-ayị ara?”

It was at this point that I concluded that my mum needed a medical evaluation.

I suspected Dementia.

An all-night search on the internet made me very nervous as her symptoms were pointing towards one disease which can only be managed and buy not curable .

Shame to money which would become useless when confronted by an incurable ailment!

Two consultants, one of which was a professor of Neurology at Lagos Teaching Hospital, independently diagnosed the same ailment.

Mama Obiora, my mum, had developed dementia after 12 years of living with my family in the city.

Broaching the issue with my wife made her open up. She was more dispassionate as she had long suspected that Mama had dementia.

She had noticed Mama’s rapid deterioration both in aggressiveness, poor memory and loss of continence. She was careful not to tell me and had prayed that I noticed them myself.

She was afraid that she might be misunderstood as most men who loved their mums so much would.

My eldest sister advised that I bring our mum home to her. She was ready to nurse Mama while I and other siblings would support with enablements.

With a sorrow-filled heart, I took mama back to my home town for a better care not without retaining the services of a well known professor at Nnamdi Azikiwe University Teaching Hospital, Nnewi.

At 84, my mum looked well fed and well taken care of but calling me an “inlaw” that Christmas was hard a punch for me to bear.

Medical science can go to hell! Perhaps, someone ws behind my mum’s sickness, I thought.

Yes! It was possible. Are we no longer in a wicked world?

Would anyone have blamed me if the prophecy of one freelance pastor who came to pray for my mum made me smell an evil rat?

The spirit-filled pastor was ready to reveal the name of the person who had cast an evil spell on my mum. That’s if we were ready to “engage” him formally.

I quickly came to my senses when he sent a very expensive bill for the deliverance. What an unbelieving customer I turned out to be!

My mum didn’t get any better but good care extended the doomsday as she joined her Maker at 86 years, 14 years after the diagnosis of her dementia.

Do you have aged parents?

Please verify those tales about your wife or/and other people based on which you took some decisions.

You might have been deceived.

Many old people in our families and in our national lives are presently at various stages of senile deterioration known as dementia but we hardly notice due to our blind love, religious affiliation, filial loyalty or hero worship.

My dear mum would have wrecked my home if not for God’s grace and my introspective capabilities.

Dementia, Alzheimer’s, Amnesia and Senility are conditions of old people.

These diseases may set in much earlier than anticipated.

The patient may look normal and be confidently acting a new normal which would have wrecked a family or a state before it becomes obvious.

Many people as young as early sixties have presented the symptoms of dementia.

Check around you. Test all you hear from your old pals. They may be feeding you with inadvertent but dangerous lies.

Refusal to sieve and verify all the tales from our aged ones could be destructive to a family or to a nation.

Anayo Nwosu

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published.

You may also like

Business Economy Technology Technology Trends

Protect against Business Email Compromise – or it may cost you dearly 

post-image

Don’t let your business be punished for, and by cyber fraud 

 

As the business landscape rapidly evolves, a general awareness of security vulnerabilities is no longer enough. Cyber fraud, data and payment breach risks need to be managed urgently and strategically with the right tools, says Ryan Mer, CEO at eftsure Africa, an automated Know Your Payee™ (KYP) platform provider.  

 

South African companies are facing a surge in Business Email Compromise (BEC) and other cyberattacks, exposing gaps in organisations’ payment systems with serious financial, reputational, and legal consequences. In January 2023, leading South African law firm, Edward Nathan Sonnenbergs (ENS) was ordered by the High Court in Johannesburg to pay R5.5 million including interest to a property buyer, Mrs. Judith…

Read More
Business Economy

Partech Africa Report: Resilient African Tech Ecosystem Still Growing with $6.5 Billion Raised in 2022

post-image

Amid the drastic pullback in global VC funding, the African tech ecosystem stands out with 8% growth from 2021. Debt funding doubled in volume to $1.5B, accounting for nearly a quarter of the total funding. Fintech, still leading, attracted 39% of the total equity volume; Nigeria retained the top spot with 23%

 

Partech Africa, the VC fund dedicated to technology startups in Africa, has issued its annual report on Africa Tech Venture Capital. The report, which aims to provide a practical picture of the state of the ecosystem, revealed that despite the global VC downturn, the African tech ecosystem grew faster than all other markets globally.

Total funding invested into tech startups on the continent reached $6.5B, an increase of 8% vs 2021, spread across 764 deals – compared to 724 rounds in 2021. The report, consisting of disclosed and confidential deals, saw debt funding more than double in volume, reaching…

Read More
Business Gadgets Security Technology Technology Trends Telecoms

CYBER SECURITY: ZORACOMS’ NSOC CENTER AS A GAME-CHANGER IN THE NIGERIAN IT SPACE

post-image

 

In a constantly evolving digital world that is fast paced, many organizations today are going fully digital or virtual. These processes have been known to deepen corporate organizations productivity and business continuity, but there are snags such as exposure and cyber threat. Criminals today are constantly evolving and finding new ways to breach the virtual and digital security infrastructures of organizations and individuals. These breaches cost as much as bullions of dollars in damages and loses when it has to get to fintechs and , identity firms other financial institutions. Having seen this loophole in the ecosystem in the area of having skilled manpower to monitor, abate and proactive these cyber threat, Zora Communications, an indigenous information technology (IT) firm Located in Lekki Area of Lagos recently launched one of a kind facility that will offer public and private sector players the desired and required tools and manpower that…

Read More
Business Events Society Technology Technology Trends

EVENTNEWS Lagos hosts gathering of Nigeria’s Top 50 Digital Economy Enablers 2023

post-image

Lagos, Nigeria’s commercial capital, is hosting the opening edition of Nigeria’s Top 50 Digital Economy Enablers February 14, 2023 at the prestigious Sheraton Hotel & Towers.  Nigeria’s Digital Economy is evolving positively in spite of a diversity of challenges for organisations in the public and private sectors.

Inspired by the need to express both the challenges and the iconic actors that have emerged to drive Africa’s fastest growing digital economy, the continent’s major tech-biz publication, published since 2007, IT Edge News.Africa (www.itedgenews.africa) and its Partners will be focusing on Nigeria’s Leading Lights referencing Nigeria’s Top 50 Digital Economy Enablers at an Industry Colloquium &Award Ceremony this February just before as the country goes to the poll to elect new political leaders.

The One Day Industry event is featuring a Nigeria’s Top 50 Digital Economy Enablers Recognition Ceremony; an Industry Networking Lunch; Nigeria Digital Economy Special Report; and the forum on  ‘Nigeria’s Digital Economy – Myth or Fact?’

According…

Read More
Business Finance Gadgets Sponsored Technology Technology Trends

DEXTER TO INTRODUCE INNOVATIVE FINTECH SOLUTION THIS Q1 CALLED CROWDBUX

post-image

 

Dexter Digital Technologies Limited, a Nigerian financial technology (Fintech) startup company with core emphasis in churning out world-class financial solutions – informed by research – into the ecosystem, has announced their plans for 2023 starting with the launch of their flagship product called Crowdbux, this first quarter.

Speaking to the media, the Founder and Chief Executive Officer of Dexter, Chidebere Onwuzurike said “We are a research-based software startup founded in May 2021, we are leveraging the boundless powers of data and insights from excellently curated user experience research to develop and innovate more powerful, and inclusive software for the fintech sector. When asked if Crowdbux as a solution will make the needed impact in the fintech sector of the software industry, he responded “Yes, I can confidently say that it definitely will. For starters, we only develop and innovate software premised on credible insights from diligently curated consumer research; and…

Read More
Business Investments Opinion Security Technology

Fraud trends every CFO should know

post-image

 

 

PwC’s Global Economic Crime and Fraud Survey 2022 revealed that 46% of organisations have experienced fraud, corruption, or other economic crimes in the last 24 months. Ryan Mer, CEO of eftsure Africa, a Know Your Payee™ (KYP) platform provider, gives a rundown of what to look out for.

 

  1. Fraud protection is no longer optional

It’s hard to believe today, but just a few years ago, even large organisations didn’t have payment fraud protection in place. One of our clients, a listed company, had an ongoing issue with payment fraud totalling over R3 million in losses in the year prior to adopting eftsure. They haven’t lost a cent to payment fraud since.

 

Businesses are taking the threat of payment fraud a lot more seriously than they did even two years ago. They’re acknowledging that the payment fraud risk is there and that it’s ubiquitous – not only large corporations and banks are…

Read More
Business Economy Finance Gadgets Society Technology Technology Trends

Cellulant Named Number One Payment Brand in Kenya

post-image

Pan-African payments technology company, Cellulant (Cellulant.io), was named as the ‘Top Payments Gateway Brand in Kenya” at the Top Star Brand Awards 2022. This award recognises Cellulant as a leader in fintech and payments acknowledging the company’s commitment to excellence and customer satisfaction.

 

The Top Star Brand Awards recognise the “crème de la crème” brands that authentically lead their respective industries in brand presence. Star brands are those that have achieved milestones, have a history of success, and, most importantly, have established themselves as trendsetters for newcomers to the industry. It is a display of those brands that have acquired unparalleled branding standards and have all the necessary components to become household names on a global scale. The awards are organized by Digital Events Ltd in conjunction with an independent panel of judges drawn from digital tech consultants, academia, IT professional bodies, relevant government department representatives,…

Read More
Announcements Business Economy

Saudi Arabia to Take Latest Giant LEAP into New World Economies with Multi-Sector Future Technology Event and AI-Focused DeepFest

post-image

100,000-plus participants anticipated as world’s most visionary tech event gets even bigger with globe’s leading disruptors heading to Kingdom in February 2023; Billionaire investors, technocrats, tech integrators, and sporting royalty from 50 countries among stellar 700-plus talent line-up.

 

After breaking a host of industry records during its 2022 launch, LEAP – the world’s most visionary technology event – returns to Riyadh in February with an even bigger format promising to attract the greatest digital thinkers and doers to empower the entrepreneurs, ignite innovation and leap into new worlds.

 

An expected 100,000 global tech innovators and disruptors will gather at the Riyadh Front Exhibition & Conference Centre from February 6-9, 2023, to unveil and accelerate a huge platform of breakthrough products and ideas, and forge partnerships that will drive new worldwide collaborations leveraging technology’s limitless potential.

 

Taking place alongside LEAP, the inaugural DeepFest – in partnership with the Saudi Data & AI Authority (SDAIA)…

Read More