By Roberta Edu
As a feminist, entrepreneur, and tech expert, I have always advocated for women’s empowerment and equality. However, through my personal and professional experiences in Nigeria, I have observed a critical pattern—when it comes to success in business, politics, or life in general, strategic collaboration with men often yields more support and results than relying solely on women.
Many assume that my advocacy for women means I am against men, but the truth is, most of my key business relationships and life-changing connections have been with men. This is not to say that women do not support each other, but rather to highlight a deeper psychological and social conditioning that influences how women interact in competitive and professional spaces.
When I embark on a project, the first people I instinctively reach out to are often a mix of men and women—yet, the ratio tends to favor men. In my experience, once you set aside the extremely misogynistic men, more men are likely to support a woman’s growth than an average woman would. This is not a matter of personal rivalry but a systemic issue. African women, having been historically conditioned to look up to men for leadership and validation, often unconsciously undermine their own gender.
This mindset is deeply ingrained. Many women, even those in positions of influence, tend to champion men over their fellow women, regardless of competence. It is a learned behavior, stemming from generations of systemic gender imbalance. While there are progressive women who actively uplift others, the percentage remains relatively small.
For women aiming to break barriers, this reality must be acknowledged, not with bitterness, but with strategy. Success requires allies, and in the current landscape, men often serve as more reliable supporters. Women in disruptive or leadership roles must ensure they have solid male allies in their corner—men who will stand by them, advocate for them, and offer steadfast support when needed.
This does not mean women are incapable of supporting each other, nor does it absolve men of their role in perpetuating gender inequality. Instead, it underscores the need for women to be intentional about fostering genuine alliances while continuing to challenge and change the narratives that hinder collective female progress.
A clear example of this disparity is evident in social discourse. If I were to be criticized online today, it is likely that men, even those who regularly debate my views, would engage in a more structured and measured argument. Meanwhile, some women, who may have never engaged with my content before, might resort to outright dismissal or discrediting. This is not personal; it is simply a reflection of the broader inequality effect.
As we work towards closing the gender gap, women must recognize these systemic influences and actively work to dismantle them. By supporting each other more intentionally and challenging ingrained biases, we can create a more balanced and empowering environment for all. Until then, strategic collaboration remains key to success in today’s world.