<\/p>\n
Julie, my late sister, had since relocated to her father\u2019s house, our house, as she had adjudged her late husband\u2019s home not very accommodating. She took her children along. Around 3pm on the 3rd of June 2024, my sister died in the loving arms of her only daughter in my family house right before MaryRose, her younger sister. Even though his abroad based first son and I were promptly informed, it was still the duty of Obiora, our eldest brother to direct on what next to do with her body. Catechist Obiora, after conferring with me, his only brother, decided to take our sister\u2019s corpse to the mortuary. My late sister\u2019s son was asked to inform his father\u2019s relatives that their wife had died.<\/p>\n
In line with Nnewi culture, Ezeumunna family of Ab\u1ee5b\u1ecd Nnewichi, our in-laws, had to send a delegation with drinks and kola nuts to my sister\u2019s father\u2019s house to inform us that their wife had died even though they knew that she died in her father\u2019s house. That visit was an opportunity to hold our in-laws accountable and ask questions on how they treated our daughter and demand for appeasement failing which we would sideline them in her burial and funeral plans. Of course, we could proceed to bury our sister as we deem appropriate and also perform her funeral ceremonies in her father\u2019s house. Yes, we could do that because she belongs to us, her relatives both in life and in death. She was only on a marriage journey to her husband\u2019s home.The leasehold regarded as marriage has ended and the ownership of my eldest sister would have to revert to her father\u2019s kinsmen.<\/p>\n
The point to stress here is that the bride price paid to marry an Nnewi woman is just a lease payment which tenor ends whenever the woman dies or is divorced. Once the woman is dead, the husband\u2019s people must return the corpse to her father\u2019s home for burial or exchange the corpse with the woman\u2019s very important household possession called ng\u1ecbga which is a woven basket with a small orifice. It is inside the ng\u1ecbga, which is usually hung to a long rope dripping from kitchen roof and is about three feet away from the fire place, that a married woman stores all her cooking condiments which need the heat from the cooking fire to be preserved.<\/p>\n
Invention of stoves, gas cookers and modernity have conspired to withdraw the use of ng\u1ecbga. The dead woman’s life picture portrait is now being used in exchange for her corpse. That is after the husband’s people must have provided some other material requirements with prescribed entertainment.<\/p>\n
In the memory of a peaceful man that married my late sister, my brother and I decided not to activate any trouble buttons but to be civil and respectful to the delegation of Ezeumunna family, our in-laws. They knew what we are capable of doing being that my extended Ezeoguine family are the rulers of Nnewi. Nnewi is a town which headship has been hereditary.<\/p>\n
Dates were agreed for the funeral rites of my late sister without hassles as we decided to regard whatever that cried in the night of her marriage journey as mosquitoes.<\/p>\n
Nd\u1ecb Nnewi have longed moved forward more than Idoma people who still insist that a wife must be returned to her father’s house for burial. They do this up till date. I learnt that many communities in Edo State still do it.<\/p>\n
Even with three grown children, Julie my late sister was referred to as Nwa\u1ecdkp\u1ee5 \u1ecckp\u1ee5nyo Otolo as she never belonged to her husband\u2019s family but her children do. My sister has always been the property of the Ezenwegbu Ezeoguine royal family as she was deemed to be on a marriage pilgrimage to her husband\u2019s house. Upon death, her mission has been accomplished and she must be returned home.<\/p>\n
According to Nnewi modernity induced amended tradition, before my sister is buried, her body must first be brought to her father\u2019s house for a brief lying-in-state before it is taken to her husband\u2019s home for the continuation of the funeral ceremonies. Any Nnewi girl married outside Nnewi could lose opportunity of this rite if her husband\u2019s town is far. So, you can now understand some of the reasons why Nnewi parents prefer Nnewi husbands for their daughters.<\/p>\n
After the brief stopover at her father\u2019s compound, the corpse is then escorted to her husband\u2019s home for continuation of funeral rites. But once the corpse is buried, all the dead woman\u2019s father\u2019s relatives will depart for the dead woman\u2019s father\u2019s compound to conduct their own funeral ceremonies, receiving and entertaining their guests. For instance, all my friends, my wife\u2019s people will pay their condolence to me and my family in my father\u2019s house. Clearly put, a married woman\u2019s funeral ceremonies take place in her husband\u2019s house and her father\u2019s house simultaneously.<\/p>\n
The funeral ceremony in the woman\u2019s father\u2019s home would be paused by early evening to enable the father\u2019s family visit their daughter\u2019s family home to perform the ibu ozu nwa ada ceremony. The father of the deceased or the person acting as his father would stay back while the funeral delegation is led by the next in line. In my sister\u2019s case, Catechist Obiora will stay behind while yours sincerely or any other relative will lead my kinsmen to my sister\u2019s husband\u2019s house.<\/p>\n
On arrival, the funeral party will approach the condolence table with drinks and clothes after which they would be ushered into a place prepared for them for entertainment which is then followed by the ibu ozu nwa ada rites.<\/p>\n
Until my family goes to take either her body, ng\u1ecbga or picture home and performs separation rituals which is now conducted in a pseudo-christian way, her spirit would not allow her husband\u2019s people rest.<\/p>\n
The actual ritual by which a dead woman’s spirit is taken back to her father’s home is called “Ibu ozu nwa ada” in Nnewi. In the case of Julie, my late sister, it has been agreed to happen on the 19th July 2024, in the evening of the day she will be buried. Once we arrive her husband\u2019s house to perform this ritual, all forms of condolences ends as the husband\u2019s family is expected to provide the final marital settlement thereafter, we take the spirit of our sister back to her father\u2019s place where she belongs.<\/p>\n
Ikenga Ezenwegbu
\n13 July 2024<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Julie, my late sister, had since relocated to her father\u2019s house, our house, as she had adjudged her late husband\u2019s home not very accommodating. She took her children along. Around 3pm on the 3rd of June 2024, my sister died in the loving arms of her only daughter in my family house right before […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":18353,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":true,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[406,346,457,301,322,300],"tags":[143,190,38],"class_list":["post-18350","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-art","category-culture","category-environment","category-events","category-opinion","category-society","tag-culture","tag-igbo","tag-society"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/techandbiz.com.ng\/tab-backup\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18350","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/techandbiz.com.ng\/tab-backup\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/techandbiz.com.ng\/tab-backup\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/techandbiz.com.ng\/tab-backup\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/techandbiz.com.ng\/tab-backup\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=18350"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/techandbiz.com.ng\/tab-backup\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18350\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/techandbiz.com.ng\/tab-backup\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/18353"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/techandbiz.com.ng\/tab-backup\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=18350"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/techandbiz.com.ng\/tab-backup\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=18350"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/techandbiz.com.ng\/tab-backup\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=18350"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}